Ch Ch Ch Ch Changes....

Sadie is going through that phase that friends warned me about when kids deal with parents separating; 3 months in and she is starting to play us off against each other. She has told him that she loves him more than me (which he took great pleasure in telling me) and has whinged every time she has gone to stay with him because she "likes being with me more than daddy" (which I haven't told him, being the more mature member of the team). She is also testing her boundaries to the limit. My guess is that when she's with daddy for the two or three days a week he spends with her, her boundaries get broadened. So much so that by the time she returns home to me she has a whole new set of rules and unless I am consistent with his teeterings into insane parenting (sweets for breakfast? playing next to a main road for fun? Late bedtimes where she gets to watch DVDs until she passes out? Christ what am I up against???) all hell breaks loose and I end up having a semi-nervous breakdown for half the week. It is hard to remain a calm parent when this is up against you, but I am trying my best. Friends say it will settle and she will get used to one set of rules for daddy's place and one set whilst at home. I just wish this glimmer of hope would leap at me from it's seemingly distant and unobtainable place. I love her to bits of course. None of this is any of her fault and her dad and I just need to keep it together, and despite all this tension, she is the one keeping me grounded and happy. But at the same time, I think I should forgive myself for those times when the pressure is off and I am free to let out my angst and whizz around like a let loose Catherine Wheel......

Gunk

I now realise that in the picture of me below I look like someone has sneezed all over my face....
I have just had a rather surreal and disturbing conversation with my boss. We do get on and have a giggle together, but he used to be a sexual health nurse and just saw fit to randomly sit down next to me at my desk and lecture me on the dangers of oral sex. I didn't bring this subject up of course- that would be weird. I merely mentioned my recurring mouth ulcer problem at the moment (which is more to do with late nights than the possiblility of an STD incidentally- I am not that irresponsible) and that was it he was off. It is very odd to hear your boss uttering the words 'cock', 'suck', 'swallow' and 'enzymes' whilst attempting to go through the renal ward invoices.

Soundtrack: Wombats-Backfired at the Disco

I see you stumble......

I am going to have to start another, anonymous blog where I can actually say what happened this weekend. Belle Du Jour I am not, but I am teetering on the brink of becoming a bit of a lady of the night of late. And I am loving it. It all started off innocently as ever and then inevitably spiralled into a hedonistic twirl of tongues, mod haircuts and my old school uniform. And I will never see Thomas the Tank Engine in the same light again. Oh my lord. Hormones have a lot to answer for. And lager.....
I am listening to far too much local radio at present, since the ex gained custody of the digital radio. Gone are the days of listening to the fantastic and ever-tasteful 6 Music. Now I spend most of my days having to be subjected to '80s Hour' or just soppy chart singles by the likes of Duffy and Rhianna. Bros's 'I owe you nothing' is on now tinkling in the background as I am about to do a marathon session on The Book. This is not good. My creativity will be completely pissed upon by those Goss brothers. I'm off to put on a John Peel compilation and get on with some proper writing......

Fishfinger sandwiches, facepacks and froot!

I have just spent the majority of this week with one of the best human beings on the planet: Miss Lucy Bullen (or The Bullencia as I have always preferred to call her). She is a sparkling star in a sky of mere twinkles and it has been a pleasure having her to stay and to show her around the quirkiness of Brighton town. We supped enough pints of Harveys local brew to sink a posh yacht in the Marina, ate fishfinger sandwiches at Bills, wore chocolate flavoured facepacks so we looked like pigs in poo, and giggled like sun-crazed indie chicks over the course of 48 hours. I cannot wait for her monthly postings of burnt CDs of her favourite music. It's about time I rekindled my indie roots a little more. I am getting far to into mainstream pop these days....And I am now off to Sheffield for my 31st to hang out with her and her gang of young, guitar-playing friends. I will be back to the old Cathy in no time....

And now, having waved The Bullencia off back to the home of Kendal mint cake at the train station yesterday, I am back to planet earth with a bump as I spent an hour last night bent over the bath, sifting nits out of Sadie's hair. Oh the glamour of parenting. But it's all part of the fun, and Sadie's hair has never looked so shiny and detangled! Poor little lamb. She has a stripe across her face too from running through a thorn bush. She looks like a mini version of Adam Ant only with a glossy bob

Soundtrack: New Royal Family- Anyone fancy a chocolate digestive?

Weddings, waxworks and vampires.....

Well after Friday's nightmare of a date (that turned out to be only marginally less scary than the hideousness that was the dark stinking freaky waxwork Robin Hood museum in Nottingham yesterday) this weekend was one of the fluffiest in a long while. Joy and Geoff tied the knot in Nottingham's picturesque Holme Pierrepont Hall on Sunday afternoon. Sadie was their bridesmaid, which in itself was enough to open the floodgates for a soppy lush like me, but the ceremony had me in tears. I was one of those annoying wedding guests who keeps sniffing loudly with my shoulders jittering, like a dried up old maid who can only experience true love vicariously through her couple friends. Nah- I'm not that bad- I am just a sucker for romance and Philip Larkin poems. And Joy and Geoff are so cute together. They really are meant to be, god love em....
The best man's speech made me think I was living in a chick flick again. For a split second I thought I was hearing things when he decided to announce to everyone at the end of the speech that he and another of the best men (there were four incidentally) rather like me. And then he sat down. This was how he ended the speech. After going bright purple from embarrassment (my best friend Jo who had been sat next to me gaffawed so loudly she had also gone red), I glugged back some champagne and went and thanked him for this information. We have decided amongst the three of us that rather than begin some sort of weird love triangle, I will share them both intermittently as and when it suits. The best man did suggest daily commutes down from Nottingham to Brighton but I think he was being a little unrealistic (and probably a little drunk). Oh what fun. And hark at me- I'll get a big fat head at this rate!
Sadie and I then had an hour to kill before our train back home yesterday so I thought I'd take her on an educational visit to the Robin Hood museum. After entering it became obvious we were the only visitors (it was a Monday morning). I now know why. It all started off great as a very handsome man dressed as Robin Hood came a chatted to us, and, having tried to unsuccessfully entice Sadie from her shy, finger-biting stance, led us into a pitch black room where loud male voices boomed around us. At this point Sadie started screaming and I wondered whether we would actually ever come out alive. Then it got even worse. A door opened into a dark, pretend cavern, and we entered to find 6 creepy waxworks in loin cloths standing staring at us. We couldn't get out until the automated doors opened for us and to be honest I was absolutely bloody petrified. I actually thought Sadie might pass out she was shaking and crying so much. This went on from room to room for about 45 minutes, until we exited completely shell shocked and feeling as though we had just surfaced from the fires of hell. What this hammer house of horrors taught us about Robin Hood I will never know. Sadie will now think that Sherwood Forest is a torture chamber. But at least, as opposed to my date with Ginge, I didn't end up with gigantic teeth marks on my right buttock and a love bite in the middle of my cleavage. I kid ye not. I was almost eaten alive.

Soundtrack: Gabriella Cilmi -Sweet About Me

Ten thousand nights of chunder

Still in an internet cafe which is never the same as freely typing away in my "office" ( a rather more glamorous name for the corner of my bedroom) listening to indie pop, and I have been feeling guilty about posting at work. I have managed to persuade Sadie to have a bobbed haircut and I am so chuffed- she looks absolutely adorable and just like Amelie when she was a little girl at the beginning of said film. And speaking of French things, on the way home today I cycled past the French market, which often frequents the Hove lawns at this time of year. I was ravenous from pushing those pedals against the wind so when I spied the freshly made baguettes and the pain au chocolats I had to pootle over there to grab myself some much needed carbs(even though the wind barely let me and I nearly fell off my bike). It was really silly though as the woman serving at le boucherie was French so I thought I should talk to her in a really crap half-french, half-english way and the conversation went something like this...
Me: 'Hello. Bonjour. Could I have one of those baguettes please, s'il vous plait'
Her: 'Ca? Oui...'
Me: (being passed the baguette)' Thanks. Merci Beaucoup. Thanks yes. And could I have a carrier bag please. S'il vous plait. Merci beaucoup. Thanks'
Oh dearie me.
Off out with my ginger nightmare tonight. Spoke to him on the phone last night to arrange where to meet him and all he said was 'Yeah' in a halfhearted way to everything I said. I have concluded that he was a)feeling shy and overcome with nerves that such a fox was ringing him and couldn't think of anything to say, b)has nothing to say or c) had a naked lady lying next to him and couldn't muster up the words "yes that would be really nice to meet you. Would you like me to take you to dinner? Yes? Can't wait. Bye" without being smacked in the face. I basically had to force feed him the idea of me....and him...in a pub....at 7.30pm...- was that ok? "Yeah".
God help me......

Soundtrack: Alphabeat- 10,000 nights

Sunny D makes you pee and late nights give you a fat neck obviously

My boss has told me to stay at home today as I have a fat neck from swollen glands, and look exhausted. I have been enjoying going to work more than being at home of late as it gets me out of the house. I have coped well. Had a free breakfast on the seafront with Rachel and Fraser and have then spent the rest of the day lying on the sofa eating home made chicken noodle soup (recipe to follow when I'm not in an internet cafe)and watching the wondrous Juno: one of the best films I have seen in a long time. I realised I hadn't even previously mentioned going to see the Sex and the City movie the other week, but this kind of film just sort of washes over you. I loved SATC but Juno is a stayer, really funny and sad, and what a fab soundtrack. I had the seven inch of the Moldy Peaches 'Anyone Else But You' years ago and am glad it's finally being recognised as a beautiful tune.
I have also been drifting in an out of sleep in a delirious manner. Hope I will be normal by Sunday as it's Joy and Geoff's wedding day. If you are reading this youse two lovelies- hello! only 3 days to go!!! You are the Juno and Bleeker of the hour (but without the car crash irresponsible behaviour and bad shorts) x