Hiccups and Hairclips

Gosh I haven't been writing enough in here lately- anyone would think I was busy spending my days wasting my time destroying my self confidence by sending off endless emails to prospective employers for freelance work. Why is it that people don't respond - even to reject you? It's very rude. Mind you, judging by my reaction to 'Alison Blunt' the other month maybe a simple blanking is better than a turn down.
Sadie turned 5 on Sunday. We took her horseriding as a surprise which was so cute! She had a Shetland pony so she looked like one of those Thelwell cartoon characters. I led her horse (I wouldn't normally dare as I find horses quite scary, but leading a Shetland is a bit like leading a very old and fat golden retriever) up onto the downs- it was a beautiful day. And then, after her perfect birthday morning, a stupid, incompetently-run "restaurant" called Barneys on Western Road in Hove (please don't go there) decided to ruin everything by making a complete hash up of her birthday tea party. It wasn't hard- we booked a table a week before and ordered a cake (I decided to have year off as I normally go mad in the catering department and nearly give myself a nervous 'bakedown'...?...) but they managed to forget about us completely. We arrived and there were 6 drunk people sitting at "our" table so we had to find a shit one at the back, they didn't come to serve us all night so we had to find them when we needed something (like food maybe?), and they forgot the cake so put together a pile of old brownies with some orange slices around it instead! Disaster. Although Sadie was oblivious and enjoyed herself regardless. I shall be writing to the management to get a free night out there. The whole point was to give myself a break this year but it was the most stressed I've ever been at Sadie's party, and last year we had 30 kids and decided to do the food and entertainment ourselves. Just goes to show, if you want a job done.....etc....

Kale

I love kale. It rocks. It's in season and it's delicious and super dooper for your body. Made it last night in my favourite way- it's really,really easy, yummy AND healthy- I like to eat this before I go tut pub so I feel like I'm not just putting poison in my body for the night... recipe below:

Tuna steak with garlicky greens
(serves 2)
2 tuna steaks
sesame oil
sea salt

2 generous handfuls of curly kale, chopped
2 generous handfuls of baby spinach
1 generous handful of savoy cabbage, chopped
3 garlic cloves, chopped small
big knob of butter/ 2 tbsp olive oil
salt and pepper
1/2 lime

Sear tuna steaks in sesame oil and a pinch of rock salt until both sides browning, but middle of fish pink. Melt butter in seperate pan, add garlic and saute, then throw in greens and stir until just wilted. Place on plate with tuna on top. Squeeze 1/4 lime over dish, season and serve. Yummy and fairly guilt free too!
(also very nice served with boiled waxy potatoes if you are hungrier, but not needed for a light, healthy dinner)
Em- kale is one for you as it's packed with calcium so v good if you're off the old cows milk produce....

The Cynical Secretary in me

I have just been asked to come for an interview for a part time PA job at the hospital kidney unit. As much as I know this job will pay well (I was once PA to the editor of the Guardian don't you know-until I got up the duff that is), will be easy and enjoyable in an anally retentive kind of way (remember how much I love lists?) it's not exactly what I had planned for My Creative Life After Childrearing. Ok- so a part time job won't take up all my time to write, but it will certainly take up half of it- that's half my writing life gone. Mind you- here I am in my 'writing life' writing my self-absorbed blog and listening to the Dirty Dancing Soundtrack ('Hungry Eyes' gets me every time) so perhaps I should get a job where I get out more and actually make some money. Although knowing my luck, I'll end up wth MRSA.

Born Sad

Friday night we were meant to be going to the fantastic-sounding Born Bad night at Brighton's Komedia. Ellie came down from London and we started drinking too early, so blew Joy etc out in favour of what we thought was going to be a quiet night at the pub and an early night. Only it didn't happen that way. After 11 hours of drinking, we, at 3am, staggered home having spent the night consuming a mixture of beer, wine, vodka and gin, and ended up in some seedy dive in Hove. To sum up the state we were in, the two men we were "fighting off" at the end of the evening wore tracksuits, and one was the other man's carer. But oh it was fun-especially the dancing around to Chaka Khan bit before I threw up. Sadie was staying the night at her best friends' place, so I somehow thought it appropriate to revert back to my days of debauchery.
So this my friends will explain my lack of entries- I have been recently catapulted into a world of nausea, but I'm just about coming round. Well- everyone else had that vomiting bug so I felt a bit left out.....
Last week before this was a great week as my stories went down a treat at Sadie's school and I've been asked back for their Book Week. I also got a day's proofreading work which was rather fun- I do like my corrections. Plus I got to read all sorts of interesting police case files which made the proofing that more interesting.
Andy has been away skiing and got back yesterday after a 24 hour delay on his flight. We've been busy catching up while Sadie has been in school today. He helped me with my tax returns and I made him a jacket potato. Ah coupledom. It's great when you appreciate it once more.

Arse

Whether it's made my appetite increase, changed my metabolism or it's just muscle growth (yeah right), since I started jogging regularly since last Spring my arse has got bigger. This was not supposed to happen. Let this be reassurance to all of you feeling guilty about not sticking to your new year's resolution for a fitter year; exercise doesn't always do what it says on the packet, if you see what I mean. Yes, running around a lot is good for my circulation, it lifts my moods (of which there are aplenty) and wards off colds, but I didn't expect a fatter booty. If I don't run for a few days I pile the weight on those buttock cheeks and upper thighs like nobody's business, whereas before I exercised at all, I could eat what I wanted and stayed slim. My butt hasn't been this large since my University diet of take away chicken burgers and 10 pints a night. Bugger it. I will have to keep running now as it's the only thing that works.
P.S. Not doing the half marathon until later in the year now- Rachael and I going for Sports Relief in March which is 6 miles; much more realistic. Anyone care to join our red faced and breathless brigade?

Jackanory I am not

Somewhere inside me I think there must be a frustrated wannabe Primary School teacher itching to get out, as now I have again roped myself into doing more than my fair share of parental assistance at the school. I'm going in tomorrow to read some of my own children's stories to Sadie's class. It'll be great fun and it's nice at last to use them for something, as they will never be published. Sadie will also no doubt love me coming in to do this which will be really cute. But I am a little concerned as writing for kids, I realised years ago, isn't my forte. Put it this way, if you were extremely drunk you could be fooled into thinking my rhymes are a bit like some of the Dr Seuss stories, but they really aren't. Dr Seuss was a genius of words; making simple sentences turn clever. My children's stories are just plain simple. One of the many reasons I love children, is that they are like small pissed people, so Sadie's classmates will no doubt love my stories, despite their simplicity and unoriginality. I might have to edit the bit where the doggy does a poop (it's very high brow). That could get them all a little excited. Oh well here goes nothing. Apart from my writer's pride.
Oh- I have lost my half marathon partner so any offers anyone? Go on- it'll be fun...
I'm off to run in the rain this afternoon so what with this and my volunteering to expose my talentless prose, maybe I have gone mad after all.

Half Cut Marathon here we come

Ooo I have been beaten at scrabble by Rachael. Mind you- I had drunk half a bottle of red and the board was sideways on, so it was to be expected! I was so sozzled at one point that I put the word 'GE' down, and also tried to put 'UNO' and 'OXO'. Oh dearie me.
We were in such high spirits that we decided last night that we're going to do the Mayor of Lydd's Charity Half Marathon this March, so I'd better get my trainers back on... Why do I do it to myself?
Have managed this last half of the week to continue getting freebies at every turn. Yesterday and today I have had the offer of breakfast at two of the mums' houses. I have accepted both of course. Mind you, one of them was in exchange for helping her clean her flat for the landlord. It's a weird experience when you don't know someone all that well and there you are, doing their drying up and making their daughter's bed. But I get another free meal out of it tomorrow as she's coming over to mine to cook me some posh chicken dish.
Made bangers and mash last night with onion gravy; here is my recipe for the gravy - it's dead easy and it MAKES this meal:

Cathy's Onion Gravy
1 onion, chopped fine
150ml red wine (drink the rest obviously)
150ml beef stock
salt and pepper

Cook sausages in a roasting tin in a knob of butter. When cooked remove and keep warm. Add onions to fat and cook until slightly soft. Add wine, stock and seasoning and de-glaze roasting tin. Bring to boil and simmer for 20 mins. Pour over bangers and mash.